One big step towards becoming an adult is moving all your crap out of your parents’ house. I was lucky enough to live in the same house for my entire childhood and adolescence (plus a couple of brief, embarrassing months after college graduation), so there was a lot of crap to move.
My closet was a veritable treasure chest of nostalgia-inducing junk. Among the lawn flamingoes, Hanson posters and questionable fashion choices, I discovered this:
It’s my kindergarten report card!
I was always a good Do-Bee as a kid, so having all “Satisfactory” marks was not a surprise to me. What was surprising was my teacher’s final comment:
“Erin’s young age is only apparent emotionally. She is an outstanding beginning reader and does really well in math also. Now if she realizes her capabilities and stops worrying about everything, she will be a high achiever!
“The developmental program should continue to be a good one for Erin. She certainly has gained many skills and is ready for first grade.
Again, “…if she realizes her capabilities and stops worrying about everything, she will be a high achiever!”
This assessment still applies, 22 years later.
And that’s how I discovered that I will probably never be an adult. Or that I have been a neurotic adult since I was 5.